To Tie Or Not To Tie The Knot

It’s an historic and very interesting time in our current progress for the LGBT’s battle in the freedom to marry. 

So, do you tie the knot or not?

 

HERE is an example of our toolkit suggesting answers to this question: 

DO: 

Take marriage seriously and realistically. 

Be aware that institutions, even “sacred” ones like marriage, usually don’t make people better. 

Be aware: marriage is not a guarantee for sex (and even less for sex ever-after.) 

Resist pressure, take your time, stay in the NOW of your relationship. 

Accept not being sure. 

Accept Not Yet. 

Be honest. 

Resist peer and family pressure. 

Resist your lover’s need to prove anything through marriage. 

Open up your old copy of Women Who Love Too Much. 

Make up your own mind. (You will bear the consequences.) 

Weigh all the pros and cons before rushing to tie the knot. (It’s better to break up over marriage 

now than suffer a divorce later.) 

Get advice from other married couples or marriage counselors. 

Consider consulting a property/tax attorney. 

Make sure you know about each other’s credit card debts. 

Spell out any conditions without fear. Do it now. (Later is too late.) 

Remember that a good marriage isn’t all that easy to pull off. 

 

DON’T: 

Don’t believe that marriage will fix your lover or her problems. Don’t think that marriage will fix your own problems. 

Don’t marry because you believe you’ll miss out on the most romantic part of your relationship. 

Don’t marry because it’s the fashion right now. 

Don’t marry because it’s “a fun game,” and you’ll get lots of gifts. 

Don’t rush because of the historical moment. 

Don’t believe that marrying proves your love. 

Don’t believe that marriage proves you stand behind your lover for better or worse. 

Don’t count on marriage to magically make love or sex deeper or better. 

 

This excerpt is taken from our book- Lesbian Marriage: A Love & Sex Forever Kit.

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